Holy [Trusting] Cow

Wow. I must tell you that I am an emotional basket case right now.

I got in a wreck tonight. The guy in front of me stopped. I didn't.

I tried.
Really.

And then I freaked out.

That moment when I knew I wasn't going to be able to stop was the worst.

I have control issues. Knowing that something bad was going to happen, and knowing I had no power to stop it really shook me up. Frazzled nerves, I have.

As the steam rose from my crumpled hood, I thought of the repairs I'd just finished paying off.
Awesome.

I've been doing the Dave Ramsey Total Money Makeover Plan. Last week, I finished Step 1: Save $1000 in a Baby Emergency Fund.

I celebrated. Told everyone. I've never been that great at saving. Spending? That I can do.
But I did it. Saved up for months.
Then paid off my repairs.
All the debt I have left is a few hundred on a credit card.

I honestly thought that if I had a savings cushion, I would be less likely to need it. Murphy's Law would target someone who wasn't prepared.
I was wrong.

Dang it.

But, God knows what He's doing.

About three weeks ago, I switched my car insurance. Full coverage, renter's insurance, and life insurance. Only paying about $40 more than I was for liability only.

But that's beside the point. The point is that God knows what He's doing.
God directed me to get that insurance, and His hand was on me today.
It could have been much worse.
I have good insurance.
I have savings for emergencies.
I'm alive and whole.
God is in control, not me.
This is a really, really good thing.

Tonight, my best friend took me to my happy place, In-N-Out. She told all our friends that I needed a hug.
I got a lot of good hugs and had good food and good times with my friends.

If you see me, give me a hug. And remind me that it's a good thing that God is in control, not me.
Trust Him.

As my mom so wonderfully put it:

Genesis 50:20 - "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives."